why bicycle shorts are always black?

BLACK

And not RED

Ebay has turned into E-Gay

Have u shopped online yet?Chances are you have or know someone who has.Shopping online means access to numerous products 24 hours a day,seven days a week all from the comfort of your own home or office.Ebay has turned into one of the giants of online shopping.But is it safe?I can tell you its not.I can honestly tell you that Ebay Malaysia, Singapore, Thailand and India is officially FUCKED by some dickheads who tries to act funny.

I was trying to sell a phone online the other day with a pretty reasonable price.I posted it up for sale in Ebay Malaysia as well as Ebay Singapore for the price of RM1500 and SGD800.I have been an Ebay member for the past 4 years.Seen many assholes and shits in ebay.And to my surprise it's still happening.And the number of asswhips are increasing.So I being a serious seller should expect a serious bidder/buyer as well.So there's this dude with a funky name of "Demetrus Oliver" who wants to close a deal for the phone.

And here goes the second dude with the same story just.May i present to you asswhip no.2 "Vera Lewis"

So the guys thought i was born yesterday.And told me that they transfered the funds to me after 2 days.Well, where the fuck is my money assholes? I dont see no money in my account.Its been a month now.Its clear now that these fellas are scammers who are trying their luck to lure some retards into believing them.Hey guess what? I aint no retard.

If you notice the attachment up there, i've underlined a few grammatical mistakes.Don't think a Vera Lewis or Demetrus Oliver would make grammar mistakes like that.But anyway nice try guys, but "proberly" next time if you wanna write an email, go to school first,learn some english before attempting cuz u suck !!!!!!!

So ppl, if you wanna purchase something you really like from ebay,pay a lil more and get it from Ebay.com(the original) and avoid ebay malaysia or singapore.Take this advice and you'll never go wrong.

P/S: Sorry ppl, you probably cant read those contents cuz its just too small.Try downloading them and read it.Have a good laugh.

xmen 4

hey guys look cyclops is not dead yet... he came back from the dead to zap everyone's ballsssss ... bewareeeee!!!!!!

how can they come out with vibrators for the eyes?? osim's gay...

for u my frenn....

hey dude... pls larrr stop the arguement about earth being the perfect sphere.. i know ur smart and u know everything .... ladies, this fella here is a walking dictionary when u need one, encyclopedia and a story book.He's like a walking kiosk filled with information.Most importantly, he can also be your fireplace if you're feeling cold.You can tell by the shape of his body.Its filled with 80% cholesterol and 20% water.Peace Yo !! hahah

close call

It was a mad navigation exercise with gay pilot Bryan... we were so close to losing our lives to a 2000ft mountain right ahead.... but with the skillz of a good pilot like me we managed to avoid the giant in front of us just in time.

Sorry that I couldnt snap some photos because my life is at risk at that particular time but here's an actual sketch of what happened:

1) Departed Melaka at 1100 hrs LMT

2)Tracked eastbound for about 30 mins due traffic and southbound to Kulai about 15 miles from Johor.

3)As you can see from the sketch there's a bloody 2000ft mountain about 4 miles from Kulai.

4)Visibility was poor and it was as low as 3km with heavy rain and broken clouds.

5)Johor Air traffic control cleared us 1000ft inbound for Johor Senai Airport once visual with Kulai

Theres more to that friends.Both of us on board we practically having fun, eating,chatting,drinking,smoking and everything else except for maintaining our heading on the compass for Johor.So there you go, what else do I have to say? We were lost for a good 10 minutes with poor visibility while on a low cruising altitude of 1000ft.We started to panic and started calculating our current position with our groundspeed and time.Carried out lost procedure and all.But nothing seems to be working.Knowing that theres a huge mountain in front of us we were just circling around some area in between Kulai and the mountains without any bearings.So theres only one word to describe that scenario, FUCKED !!!!

Not long after, I saw high ground coming up on the windscreen of the aircraft.Surprise surprise !!!! its that dude which is 2000ft high!! nice job but he didnt kill us cuz he's not pro enuff... it was all good experience... landed in johor safely and had lunch in the terminal.The flight back was all good as well. We were more aware that time but i was feeling abit sleepy after the meal.

approaching johor in misty weather

the buddy we miss

i know its gay to tell u this man...i know you're gonna curse me, i know you're gonna smack me so bad, i know you're gonna steam so badd... but i think most of here do wanna tell u this man.... we miss u.... and we wanna watch u dance without ur clothes on... cindy wants to help u shave... lili wants to eat u for dinner.... charles wants to molest u and I wanna bring u to MONGKOK CHAR CHAN TENG!!!!! lol

kim yew, we're all awaiting your return... u know we miss ur big arms and charles would like to challenge u to an arm wrestle.... cuz he's got a big arm too he says....

ok kim yew, to spice things up a lil I'm gonna post the exact conversation between me and Charles the other night...... here goes:

Charles: Shit man, i miss kim yew lar...

Me : yeah ler me too larr.. he's coming back in december so we can give him a "CUP" of shut

the fuck up....

Charles: hahahah im gonna tell him.... hahahahaha

Me : aiyahhhh why like that.. we all fren fren marr...

Charles: hahahaha actually i also wanna shut him up... kim yew always thinks his arms is damn

huge and all... i think ur balls even bigger man.... wahahhahaha

Me : yeah thats true also... my balls knocked my gf out before and it was easy....

Charles: i think i wanna "chek cau" ( in english means fight) with him lar...

Me : u go and try ler.. i dont dare lar....

Charles:Scared of wattttt...... "keng kui yau nga ar??" (in english means scared he
got teeth issit??)

---------------------------------THE END-------------------------------

say NO to McD's

When i hear McDonald's, it sounded like it was coming from a pale,sickly pervert penetrating my mind and molesting my brain.I can't believe they're so big! Who eats that crap?? I mean, seriously, the food is barely a notch above eating dirt. The burgers here, consist of soggy buns, wilted lettuce, pink mystery sauce, and a half-assed excuse for a patty. The last burger I had from McDonalds had the consistency of pig snot and tasted as good. THE FOOD IS HORRIBLE. BOYCOTT MCDONALDS.



So now ladies and gentlemen,

May i present to you the consequence of eating too much McDonald's:

are you afraid now??